This is a hoot. I love it, you have to check this out.

Curtsey to Gordon, at Dog Snot Diaries, I love those guys over there. They come up with the best stuff.

As I'm reading the news this afternoon I'm going from article to article and things just do not seem quite right. Granted I have a headache from hell for the past 3 days...the world seems slightly off axis for me anyway.

First off, I come upon this. Patti at the Dem Convention? Patti for God's sake, what are you thinking?

So my next click of the mouse takes me to this?

Former Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein spends his time in solitary confinement writing poems, tending a garden, reading the Koran and eating American muffins and cookies, a British newspaper has reported.

We are giving him God damned muffins? Cookies? Far as I'm concerned this fucker should be given canned Spam.

So after these two things get the volume turned up of the thumping above my left eye I come across this one:

A state appeals court ruled that a verbal agreement between a woman and her sperm donor was invalid, and ordered the man to pay child support for the woman's twins.

Haven't sperm donors supposed to have been paying breeders child support for decades now? Or vice versa, depends on who is raising the children?

Oh well, like I said, I have a headache, nothing seems to be "normal" today. Maybe it's the drugs. Maybe it's my brain on drugs. Maybe I just need to go shopping now. The news is obviously above me.

One more day to work and I'm on vacation. I'd do a happy dance but I'm too tired. Friday afternoon I'm sure all my long lost energy will be bestowed on me by the Friday Gods. Can we have an amen?

I have a few plans:

Saturday: Sleep
Sunday: Sleep
Monday: Shop
Tuesday: Sleep and Shop
Wednesday: Fly to east coast
Thursday: Spend the day with Susan, doing God knows what. Probably shop.
Friday: TBA
Saturday: Wine and casino in West VA.
Sunday: TBA and fly home Sunday night.
Monday: Sleep

Tuesday back to work to pay for all the shopping. Ugh. Damn, I shouldn't of did this post, now I feel my vacation is over and it went too fast. I should of taken two weeks, I'm not sure I'll get enough sleep in now.

Although this story is gross, I guess it could of been worse. At least KFC will no longer be purchasing abused chicken.

I rarely eat chicken and now I think I'll eat it even less. Now it's not that I have anything against eating meat, but I used to raise my own chickens...and yes, I'm a chicken serial killer myself. But I changed. I've reformed. I've paid my debt to society.

I guess after reading this there are two things I'm thankful for: I don't kill chickens for a living and I've never killed a cow.

So while I'm bitching about airport security I might as well throw in this little article on how to negotiate terms if you are bumped off your flight. It seems bumping is on the rise and the way to get the best deal is to volunteer to get bumped. I seem to be building up my frequent flyer miles here lately...so maybe I'll get my chance to wheel and deal. My luck I'll end up with a airport hot dog and an 8 hour wait.

So check it out.

It seems the article Terror in the Skies, Again? has ruffled a few feathers and now the main stream media has picked up on it. Anne Jacobsen has written a part 2. Terror in the Skies, Again? Part II.

Seems she's been bombarded with email and phone calls over the incident, but the shocking part is this wasn't an isolated incident.

A couple of gems:

Gary Boettcher, Member, Board of Directors, Allied Pilots Association, said, "Folks, I am a Captain with a major airline. I was very involved with the Arming Pilots effort. Your reprint of this airborne event is not a singular nor isolated experience. The terrorists are probing us all the time."

During a later phone conversation I had with Boettcher, he told me that based on his experience, it was his opinion that I was likely on a dry run. He said he's had many of these experiences and so have many of his fellow captains. They've been trying to speak out about this but so far their words have been falling on deaf ears.

Also:

According to Mark Bogosian, B-757/767 pilot for American Airlines, "The incident you wrote about, and incidents like it, occur more than you like to think. It is a 'dirty little secret' that all of us, as crew members, have known about for quite some time."

I guess I'm like the rest, what the hell is the government doing about this? I for one could care less about being politically correct. I've had my underwires (bra) patted and the wand over my boobs more times than I care for. God knows what profile I fit.

I suppose I'd be over the top if I said: If you are from the middle east and you are getting profiled and searched going through airports...tough shit, take it or go back to where you came from.

So I guess I'll refrain from saying that. Next time.

I'm continously amazed when I run across someone who doesn't know what a blog is. It happens alot. Often I'll mention some little tidbit I've read on a blog and more often than not I'll get the Rain Man look. A few people will ask what I'm talking about, some will snap out of the dullard look and progress to the "whatever" look.

So if anyone happens to stumble here via Google while doing a search for "fat butts", "weird sex" or "corn fed women", check this out:

What are blogs?

I can sum it up real fast: It's someones web site where they can post whatever, whenever the hell they want. Sometimes normal people will leave comments on your site, most often it's perverts, murder suspects and the women who love them, viagra pushers and last but not least people into hot sex. Not that it's a bad thing. Unless the email address is bogus of course.

Well my determination to get up early and go to work early seems to be going well. Maybe a little too well. Waking up at 4:34am on a Sunday morning is not exactly a thrilling moment in life. Thank God for news sites and blogs. I wonder what I used to do in the early hours before the internet? Read? Sex? Can anyone actually remember?

My goal for blogging more frequently is, well, not doing good. I've been doing a little soul searching as to why this is and have come up with a few excuses reasons.

1. Work sucks. Yes, even I'm tired of thinking it, living it and whining about it. All that is wrong with the world today is directly related to my place of employment including the fine wrinkles around my eyes, love handles and Arabic terrorists.

2. People I know read my blog. There is something to be said about anonymous blogging. A person can write forever about the annoying habits and little quirks about ourself and the ones we love....if it's anonymous. Now I've mentioned my significant other is younger than myself...so it's a little hard to blog about the Loreal color of the month, PMS, drooling, and toilet paper stuck to the bottom of my shoe at inopportune times. Hard to maintain my goddess image that way. Not only that, if I do something stupid, Susan will read about it and mock me for eternity. We can't have that.

3. Procrastination. I am the Queen. My Grandmother always said "The road to hell is paved with good intentions". Well my yellow brick road is paved in gold. My mother never liked my little saying "Never do today what can be done tomorrow". Words I try to live by.
(Damn, forget THAT #3, you know who might read it.)

3. Volunteering at local hospitals and women and children shelters.
(Really, really I do.) Ok...moving right along.

4. Pogo. Have any of you tried Phlinx? It is rather addicting.

Well anyway, I guess that is enough for now, I have so many things to do.

I thought I would share an article about some shenanigans on a NWA flight from Detroit to LA. Very interesting read.

Terror in the Skies, Again?

...I'm trying going to rearrange my schedule to try to get to work earlier. So that means up by 4:30am and hitting the road by 6:30 6am. I've been spending anywhere from 15-20 hours a week on the road trying to make the 55 mile roundtrip to work.

Orange barrels seem to be everywhere. I think there is a conspiracy. I know Big Brother has video surveillance in these things and my every move has been monitored. It's like they know I'm going to take an alternate route to avoid them....and then the next day they appear in that route. They are multiplying faster than the speed of light. My biggest fear at this point is that one day I come home and a orange barrel is blocking my bed.

So for now I guess, I'll quit sitting here and procrastinating, there are orange barrels waiting for me.

Ok, well I'm feeling much better now. Today was my first day back at work after a great 4 day weekend. I spent the weekend in Virginia just chillin and enjoying life. Well chillin is the wrong word, it was humid and hot as hell...and I think certain portions of my brain may have fried into crispy lumps. I tried to eat as much ice cream and frozen custard as possible to preserve portions of my brain.

I had a co-worker die last Thursday from breast cancer. She was a great woman. Very loving, caring, hard working caregiver. She took medical leave about a year ago to begin chemo and radiation.

Her funeral is tomorrow in Detroit and I had planned to go. I was advised by my superiors this wouldn't be in my best interest. Safety reasons. I was reminded that several ex-employees that I invited to leave my facility would be present. I really really hate this. At first I was somewhat defiant, angry and thought...fuck it. Then reality hit...this isn't Iowa. This is Detroit. I'm so sad.

Anyway....I love you Celeste. You are greatly missed.

I'm sick to death of you. I've had over 60 spam comments in the last 2 days. Are you happy now? I mean...what's the point here? Can't you get a real fucking job or what? If you have to sit on the damn computer all day...go play Pogo, go cruise porn sites, go have cyber sex for all I give a damn.

I'm sick of hitting delete, delete, delete. I'm sick of you...I'd like to delete your ass. Some how I'd like to find a way to report your child raping, teen molesting, incest sick ass sites to someone along with your IP addresses. Fuckers.

I'm done. For now.

Been forever and a day since I've blogged. Again. I never forget that it is here, I think about it every morning, every night. I think I really do need to blog, but I really have little to say. My life is BORING.

June is now gone. Forever. Let's see...what did I do. Well I went to work and came home. Went to work and came home. Repeat that 20 plus times. I definitely need to do something to spice up my everyday existence. Just to prove I do exist. I think I need something else to do maybe instead of racking up all those Pogo tokens and thinking about blogging.

I am spending 4 days with the man in my life this weekend. Far away from Detroit and it's madness. Definitely a well needed break.

Work is still ....well work. Crazy, frantic and never boring. For some reason the term "life-sucking" comes to mind. Still no video surveillance, but the added staff has definitely made a difference.

Anyway...to conclude all of this, I've decided if I win that 280 million dollar lottery this weekend I'm going to have a lot to blog about.