I ran across this little gem when I got home from work this evening:

National statistics just released show the average staff turnover rate at nursing homes is close to 100 percent a year.

Don't I know.

My stress level is profound. I have a whole bitch session going on in my head but I'm just too damn tired to even talk about it anymore. What's the point. The old adage "you can't fight city hall", comes to mind. I don't even know what I'm the most upset about...people who care for people who don't give a shit anymore? Healthcare is not about taking care of people anymore...but doing the absolute minimum to save a buck? It's a toss up...and it all sucks.

I need to put in my notice at work...but it makes me feel like I failed, I'm turning my back on my patients and the damn good staff that I do have. Maybe like a traitor? I'm just tired of the war...and you shouldn't have to feel like that at work...should you? You shouldn't have to explain every fucking day to adults that if you don't do your job in a place like this...someone is being neglected? I shouldn't have to hear that I'm spending too much on incontinent briefs, medications and no they can't have fucking milk for lunch anymore. The next person that tells me my expectations are too high...I'm going to get ugly.

Damn, I can't decide whether to laugh hysterically, throw something or just cry. I guess I lied about the "being too tired to talk about it". I'm done now.

No doubt about it...it's time to turn.

Seems Billy Joel did it again:

Singer Billy Joel was involved in his third car accident in two years when he slammed into a house on a wet road on Long Island.

Now I can understand once. Things can happen twice. But three times? Something just ain't right here. Why do these lyrics keep running through my head:

Captain Jack will get you high tonight

And take you to your special island

Captain Jack will get you by tonight

Just a little push, and you'll be smilin'

Sort of catchy aren't they?

Well I'm leaving in the morning for Iowa for the weekend. Have an important birthday party to attend...the little munchkin turns 2 on Saturday. So no work for me tomorrow...hallelujah, can we all say amen.

Hopefully Susan will come out of her pre-marital bliss state and share what's been going on in her life. Twenty-three more days until the big day. How about it Susan...can you come out of hiding and help me out?

I had an interesting conversation with my boss this morning that I really did not have time to reflect on much. Ever have one of those conversations that shock your beliefs and thoughts that you just have to put it out of your mind...for your own peace of mind? Actually I can't even say it was a conversation because it was all one sided...it went basically like this:

"Dawn...I was thinking last night, and I just think you are trying too hard. I mean, what and where is it getting you? You are losing sleep and worrying about things that can not seem to be changed. You have to do all these union grievance hearings...and someone turns around and does it again. I think you should just quit trying. I mean, who is going to notice? Who really cares? Really, what is the point?"

I was speechless for at least a full minute. The only thing I could think to respond was "Well ____, I can do that I guess. But then they really don't need us here, we might as well start our vacation today."

Then she left my office with "well it's something to think about."

I have entered the Twilight Zone. I'm going to think about this conversation later. It refuses to compute. Ctrl+Alt+Del. System is shutting down.

..for any of you slow ass drivers out there. Where is the pain in going the speed limit?

I mean...I have this burning desire to know what those thought processes are.

I thought I would share that just in case you hadn't noticed. I've always thought that ...well maybe I was just a little bit off-kilter. A few french fries short of a happy meal, or however you prefer describe it. I've always played that little games of "I'm ok, you're ok". "I'm ok, you're not ok." "I'm not ok, you are far from ok." But todays game is "I'm not ok, and don't care what you are, I am having a crisis."

Well hopefully we all bounce in and out of those modes. I guess I would be more worried about the person that stays stuck in one of those. Well today I sort of had a little crisis...and I have no clue why, but it happened at the dentist's office. Now my dentist thinks I'm weird, well he's right, but thankfully he can't officially diagnose me with something from the DSM-IV, and I definitely didn't share my list with him.

So...I get this little voice mail this morning that I have a dental appointment at noon today for a filling. Damn...I really didn't have this on my agenda. Fine..I'll go. Today was one of those everybody is needy days and I'm still seriously behind on my work from taking a vacation. So at 11:50 I run out of the door, literally with people following me to the parking lot still asking questions and race to the office.

I walk in at 12 sharp and the little gal takes me right to the back and plops me in the chair, puts the little bib on me, then proceeds to test what sounded like the drill behind me. I think it was at that moment I broke out in this cold sweat and my heart stated racing, I jumped out of the chair and said "well guess what, we aren't doing this today. Nope. Thanks, how much do I owe you? Bye now." As I'm ripping off the little bib and grabbing my purse.

The little gal gets a little pale and tells me I shouldn't leave til I talk to the dentist, and tells me to have a seat because I'm looking a little pale. Fine, everyone is pale. Ok fine, I'll wait...but I'm not getting back in that chair. She runs out of the room and grabs the dentist who comes in and asks me what the problem is. Well I have no answer for that...only "I have to get out of here." He proceeded to chit chat a little and I do remember him saying he was kind of rushed and thankful for the break that this will give him. Not as thankful as I was.

Anyway, I have no clue why I panicked, never have at the dentist before. Doesn't even make me feel uneasy about going back. The only thing I can come up with is...I'm just weird.

I must really be getting older out of practice because that one little graveyard visit has screwed me all up. How can my biorhythms get totally FUBAR in one day? Have I ever mentioned I hate Mondays anyway? Really what plays more havoc with inner peace and serenity then Mondays?

During my visit to Virginia my friend Andrew set my laptop up for wireless. All I had to do when I got home was plug things in correctly to the right place. Well after a few attempts and several days I finally listened to his directions and my laptop is now wireless. Yippee.

So now instead of being in my little room with the computers, stacks of books and other things I have to have might need I can cruise the internet from the comfort of my couch, dining room table, bed....I think you get the picture.

So last night as I'm flipping channels and watching the Sopranos and Deadwood...and talking in IM from the couch, many would use the word multi-tasking. Oh please. Actually I think I'm stuck somewhere in between couch potato and Princess. Let's see...would that be a fruit?

Kelley is back with the Cul-De-Sac again with a roundup of a 170 blogs. Yep, that's right 170. Make a pot of coffee...this one is going to take you awhile. At least it will take me awhile.

that the birds start chirping before 5am? Dunkin Donuts is open and Bob Evans is closed? Just an FYI.

Well things weren't too bad at work...nobody sleeping, but I did find 3 employees outside that didn't belong there. I'd like to say I didn't find any violations of a greater magnitude...but I can't. One employee tried to get ugly with one of my managers until she seen me coming down the hall, I must be looking damn scarey this morning, because she shut the fuck up fast.

So I inserviced them all on the violations I found, obtained their signature of understanding of what I'm telling them and there will be no further education on certain matters. Signatures hold up nicely in arbitration hearings so I've found out. So now I have to figure out what night I'm going back. Won't be tonight.

Well it's 2:15am and here I sit sipping the first cup of coffee of the day. Yes I'm sitting here thinking "What the hell is with this shit?" too, well my body is, my head supposedly knows what is going on. Time for another graveyard shift surprise visit after rumors of sleeping, carousing and the normal behavior that can be found at any Motor City Big 3 plant at this time of night.

So I'm off to a rendezvous with two of my other managers at Dunkin Donuts to coordinate the surprise entry. Usually I do this alone...but call it a hunch, but I'm not feeling particularly safe walking through the OK Corral this night.

Hopefully I ran all the bad guys down the road Friday. If all goes well, I'm keeping my fingers crossed I'm back home by 7am. I see a big nap in my future.

I ran across an article this morning in the Detroit Free Press that has me sitting here shaking my head.

Margaret Horvath is suing William Hubner, her lover of 17 years, for breach of contract, saying he promised her a lifetime of luxury. It will be up to a jury of eight to decide whether she is entitled to up to $27 million to maintain the life to which she has become accustomed.

Actually I'm not even sure what I'm shaking my head at. The inability of some people to walk away from a relationship gone sour? The ability of some to act like a fool over money? The need many feel for revenge? Or maybe it's the press who feel the need to exploit the rich?

Then it makes me wonder how I would react in their shoes. I would hope I would not act the fool, but I guess we all have our moments. Frankly I think she needs to move on and get a job.

Seems Hugo Selenski and friends will be mentioned on Primetime tonight according to the Times Leader. In a segment about psychic detectives and the still missing Cindy Song from Penn State.

Song, 21, disappeared from Ferguson Township, near State College, after leaving a Halloween party in October 2001. A police informant had told police Selenski claimed he and Kerkowski abducted Song and that Kerkowski kept her enslaved at his Hunlock Creek home until she died. The informant, Paul Weakley, told police Selenski said he then buried her.

Isn't that just peachy?

Vacation is officially over...I'm trying to be big about this and not whine. Damn it's hard. At least I don't have to go into the facility today, I have an all day meeting to attend. Corporate yahoos are flying in to tell us how to (can you guess? ) "Save Mo' Money". Shocker there.

I'm sure as I'm sitting there doodling on the handouts and daydreaming....one picture that was taken at Mt. Vernon will come to mind every time one of the yahoos interrupts my fantasies.

I'm glad to share it.

Now I'm off to the meeting and I refuse to let them burst my bubble.

I always complain about idiotic Detroit drivers on their cellphones but I think I have to admit, drivers on the east coast are worse. Who knows, better reception?

Since so many of our lawmakers hang out on the east coast...seems like they've decided to do something about it.
See the Virginia traffic sign.

Ok...so I'm kidding, my daughter sent me this. Anyway...can you hear me now?

Looks like Daniel over at Lobowalk is taking on some spammers. I think I hear low rumblings coming from out west and I'm awaiting the mushroom cloud.

Well in case you hadn't noticed I've been away on vacation. Yes, I took my laptop with me...and could of blogged, but life got in the way of blogging, and it was wonderful. I'm still in my happy little bubble that I refuse to have popped.

I could write a 25 page rambling essay about the whole trip, but I'm too damn tired and my arms and other things are aching. Now if I felt like this after a hard day at work I'd be bitching...yeah, I know me. But everything is pleasant in my bubble. Coming home was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Good thing bubbles can survive over distance and at 35,000 feet.

I love these tests, especially when they give completely erroneous results that put me in a good light.

Curtsey to Rosemary for this one.

You are a GRAMMAR GOD!


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preserve the English tongue, it should be.
Congratulations and thank you!


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Well I woke up 2 minutes before the alarm clock went off this morning, despite the time change. Spooky. Even though I couldn't get to sleep last night. I've been plagued with nightmares the last few nights...car accidents, drownings, and last night bugs. I really detest bugs, but let's not go there.

I start my vacation tomorrow...yippee! One day of Monday hell to get through, well almost through. I plan to slip out the back by 3 and not look back. Regardless of any God, man or drama queen disasters.

In other news...I got my hair cut Saturday. Somehow 3" became at least 6". Long layers became short ones. So the shorter my hair, the curlier it is. Thank you God for those little straightening irons, now if you would please leave the humidity down we will have a workable plan.

Tomorrow is packing day. How does one pack for almost 6 days of living out of suitcase? I'm trying to plot to get by on one suitcase. It's not happening in my mind. On a normal day I change my clothes twice...clothes for work, come in the door...bra goes off, and clothes suitable for braless comes on. Ok, then it's time to take the garbage out...so a shirt suitable for braless incase you run into a neighbor has to be put on. Well yes I do plan to wear a bra on vacation so that's not my current dilemma, but what if I spill a margeurita down the front of my clothes in the middle of the day or something. So then it's outfit #2 for the same day. Somethings are just so difficult. I guess I'll worry about that tomorrow.

Oh...and just one other thought. When is Bush going to quit playing Nam and tell those guys over in Iraq to start cleaning house for real? Excuse me, isn't it time to kick ass? Screw those raids, do some leveling. It's much easier to see the enemy when they have nothing to hide behind.

I haven't seen much in the news lately about flash mobs, but this one definitely had a little different twist to it:

A "flash mob" of PC-toting technophiles descended on the University of San Francisco's Koret Gym on Saturday, hoping to create one of the fastest supercomputers in the world.

They ended up with a total of 669 computers. They fell short of their goal but the concept of it still seems quite amazing.

I probably shouldn't find this as amusing as I do, but I do.

A California man has pleaded guilty to residential burglary after he set up a meeting with a woman on a rape fantasy Internet chat page, but instead broke into a different woman's apartment.

The poor lady. I bet that guy really feels stupid.