Hmm, this shit really pisses me off. As much as it pisses me off, it is a delicate situation for the reasons you’ve already stated.

One possibility is to have a personal sit down with the coaches. You could tell them to can the foul-mouthed degrading crap. If they can’t come up with a more imaginative way to motivate their team than they have no business being coaches. Also, you could follow everything up by letting them know that your son didn’t let you in on it, someone else did. What this does is let them chew on the notion that you might not be the only one concerned about it. I doubt you are anyway.

If you do take this route, the very last thing out of your mouth should be that if you even catch a hint of any retaliation towards your son you’ll do things to these coaches that would make Satan wake up in the middle of the night screaming for mercy and begging for mommy to turn on the lights.

That being said, if it were me, I’d talk to your son first before doing anything. See exactly how he feels about it. Chances are he knows these coaches are, in their own idiotic way, just trying to motivate the kids. Sure, it’s difficult to know that your son, along with the other kids, is being verbally abused in this way. However if he’s willing to deal with it for the love of the game then it’s actually something he will learn from believe it or not.

I remember when I was in high school football the coach told everyone that if they injured a member of the opposing team enough to put them out of the game he’d buy them a stake dinner. I told him to fuck himself in front of everyone and walked out never to return.

Heh heh ... "stake" dinner ... sounds good for Halloween!

I agree, I would talk to him first, since quoting people's words out of context seldom tells the tale.

However, it seems to me unlikely that using words like that, directed at people, especially high school students, is ever appropriate.

I personally would check in with other parents, and also with some of the school faculty. Call 'em up, and just innocently try to get the scoop. "Hey, I was hearing that they use pretty salty language in the locker room ... is that really the case? I'm not syaing I'm against it, just curious what's going on there?" type of thing.

That gets it on the radar screen, without taking a stand. And believe me, any administrator with the sense God gave a billy goat, will be all over that pronto. But it doesn't come from you ... it's just the buzz ... people have started talking ... you just asked a question ...

Hey, that's realpolitik, if you ask me ... and it gets the job done.

Yeah, yeah. Thanks for pointing it out:)
Okay, "steak", I'm going to bed now . . .

Woah. They're ACTUALLY calling the kids this??? Okay, I'd be pissed. I'd go rip their fucking heads off and shove them up their asses, but that's just me. I would file a formal anonymous complaint with the school board. That way your child wouldn't be targeted. Man, I'd be pissed.

I'd imagine more parents of players would also be outraged and as a group could facilitate a change like firing the bastards.

Hey, they are words. I dunno, words are words and people's feelin's about words are people's feelin's. Sounds like your daughter doesn't like the words and your son doesn't like the coaches. Words don't really injure, it is just people's attitudes about words that cause the problem. Just give the words a better definition and the problem will cease. ;) Of course, I might be full of shit or somethin' here. Take it for what it is worth.

I love you, Tiger...but words can DESTROY a person, sometimes.
Believe me. I know.
My first thought here, being childless myself, is to wonder what Acidman would think of this, what with his son playing football and all.

Thanks everybody you given me some great ideas..to think about tomorrow.

Stevie..with Acidman you never know, he might say take it like a man...or shoot the sumbitches.

It's high school football. Have you seen Varsity Blues?

This is why I didn't play it. I like it (cf. earlier comment about Miami football -- I meant the Dolphins, not the 'Canes; college football bores me), but the coach didn't come highly recommended.

The JV football coach often had teams going 9-2 or 8-3. The Varsity coach often went 4-7, 6-5, etc. I don't think we ever won a championship (admittedly, we had a LOT of good teams in our division and area).

I was a wrestler. Occasionally the coach would get pissed at us for not winning more (although we did have a winning record), but generally he was more concerned with making us better wrestlers.

Makes sense to me. But I guess with the pressure-to-achieve mentality that so many parents of high school football players have, that just doesn't work.