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When I read this post by Tiger...I thought wow, this is my life. Those lyrics:
I don't pick up the mail, I don't pick up the phone
I don't answer the door, I'd as soon be alone
I don't keep this place up, I just keep the lights down
I don't live in these rooms, I just rattle around
I'm just a ghost in this house
I'm just a shadow upon these walls
As quietly as a mouse I haunt these halls
I don't feel depressed, I don't feel sad. I just feel like I'm doing time. I've loved, I've laughed, I've cried and life keeps moving on. I had a 20 year marriage, I've had my kids, I've had my career.
The last five years I've had two relationships that could of gone long term, but it was like putting in time with them also. When I first separated and filed for divorce I could not imagine living life alone, without love...hell without sex. Over the last seven years my priorities have changed. I have no fucking clue what they are, but I guess part of me knows what they aren't.
Tiger writes:
I have thought about seeing a doctor, but then I would be saying something is wrong with me for feeling this way, and I don't think there is anything wrong with me for feeling this way. In fact, I think I am feeling exactly like any normal person would feel who has lived through the kind of life I have had so far.
I think he's right. In the meanwhile I'll do my time and see what happens.
Funny, I was so there just a few years ago and content to living out my life alone. Seriously, content. And then Mrs. Hook dropped into my life and all that changed. I don't think Tiger needs a doc, it is OK to haunt your halls, isn't it?
Posted by: Sgt Hook at September 28, 2003 07:49 PMWhat is life without hope, if even just a singular hope?
Just thinking out loud. This post (and Tiger's) will have me thinking for a while.
Posted by: Sophorist at September 28, 2003 10:24 PM